Bullying Special Needs Children

Bullying Special Needs Children:

One reason I chose to homeschool my children was because I didn’t want Losh to deal with bullying. I didn’t want Kaia to have to deal with that secondhand bullying either. I know that siblings of special needs children are also bullied. 

Unfortunately, we had our first experience today.  I was shocked: Losh was oblivious. 

Teaching acceptance begins at home. Don't allow bullying special needs children

It was from a young(ish) child who has no siblings.  By all means, this child was ignorant. Now, I don’t say that to be mean. I say it in the truest sense. This child was:

“lacking knowledge or awareness; uneducated”

This child was uneducated. She lacked awareness. This child had obviously been taught that people who use wheelchairs were somehow inferior to those who didn’t. She didn’t view Losh as being capable and all I could think was, “This problem lies with the parent.”. 

How is she seeing her parents treat those in wheelchairs? 

What kind of things is she hearing her parents say?

What kind of role model are her parents being to her?

 Bullies are more likely to

 This kind of behavior isn’t something that she could have made up herself. It was a learned behavior. By nature, children are very accepting and inclusive of those that are different than them. For a little girl to do what she did to Losh, she had to have learned it somewhere.

Bullies are more likely to:

  •  share their negative behavior with their own children
  • have poor or abusive relationships
  • become aggressive
  • commit crime
  • have limited social skills
  • have low self-esteem
  • be isolated from their peers
  • become depressed

It’s so easy to blame the bully for their behavior, but I fully believe that bullying starts at home. As parents, we must all look at ourselves and see what kind of message we are sending to our children. Are we teaching them acceptance? Are we teaching them to include others? Are we leading by example? We can’t tell our children to do something when our actions don’t support that message. 

Practice what you preach! Don’t allow bullying special needs children.

As a special needs mom, it is not my job to teach your child acceptance. It is YOUR job. 

Don’t send your child into the world ignorant.

 

26 thoughts on “Bullying Special Needs Children

  1. aimee fauci

    If you don’t mind sharing, what happened? This would give me a better understanding of the post. BUT if you do mind sharing.. it’s tough. I wonder what was going on in the kid’s head? I remember once when my oldest was a baby and she had a feeding tube and a little girl ran up to me and said. ‘What happened to her and what’s that?’ I welcomed the question but the mom pushed her away and said that was rude of her daughter to ask. Education is key.

  2. Julie

    My daughter is not special needs, but she is ADHD and has social anxiety (side effect of ADHD). Anyway, this makes her an obvious target for bullies. Luckily, we live in a small town and she is surrounded at school by her competitive dance friends (they really stick together). Sadly, it was another dancer who first bullied her. It got very ugly as her mother is the bully of the PTA. In the end, they buried themselves as most bullies do. My daughter is coming home next year as she is supposed to start middle school. I’m not letting her go through that. Take care.

  3. Amy Albers

    I’m so sorry for what happened, but how graceful you were with this child! You are absolutely correct that bullies often behave the way they do because they feel bad about themselves and need to drag others down. I’m really impressed by your attitude regarding the whole matter!

  4. Jeanine

    Bullying in general has to stop. Special needs and not I have had enough! I deal with it too much and seeing a special needs child be bullied would be the end of it for me. Parents need go start parenting and teaching their kids proper behaviour because it’s out of hand!

  5. Robin Rue (@massholemommy)

    I think bullying in general needs to stop, not just with special needs kids. It’s a horrible thing to be the victim of – no matter who you are.

  6. Maureen @ A Debt Free Stress Free Life

    Our world is full of ignorance that is spread from ignorant parents to their children who then grow up as ignorant individuals and the cycle continues. Why it’s so hard for people to just be accepting of everyone is beyond me. It’s sad and I’m sorry you and your child had to go through this.

  7. Pam

    Bullying is such a pervasive problem these days. It’s so important to teach your child tolerance for those who are different. You can’t let your kid be rude and ignorant forever.

  8. Emily

    I feel like bullying is taking over our country. As parents, we ALL need to do our part to ensure our children are respectful of EVERYONE.

  9. Chrystal @ Nevermore Lane

    I was bullied when I was younger. I wasn’t special needs but I was badly teased for things that were beyond my control. I had bullies up until I was about a sophmore in high school. The world is cruel and parents can do so much. I happen to know some really good parents who have taught their children well, but once the child gets to school , they do what they want. A parent can teach their child to love and respect but in the same breath it is also up to the child to follow through with what their parents teach them.

    There are just some children who think they are better despite what parents teach them. They think they are inferior to the world around them. Yes, they can be helped, but not until they are ready. Some kids just won’t change no matter how hard you try.

    Long of the short of it is, you can’t always blame the parents. Some have just done all they can and have no idea what to do next. Perhaps it is the parent that just needs some help.

    Kiddo was bullied. She was living with her mom and not taking showers or wearing clean clothes. So, the kids teased her because she smelled. I tried to tell her that she had to take a shower and that if her mom was not doing laundry then she should take it downstairs to their basement and do a load.

    Now it is not a problem because she’s in our custody and goes to school where her dad went to school. She has tutors and lots of friends. Her ADHD and learning disabilities are being battled at rapid speed.

    She has become the popular girl and now we have to teach her not to use her power for bad for to be the girl who loves and honors everyone. We are all the same underneath despite the small differences.

    1. LifeAsAConvert Post author

      I can agree with you to a certain extent. I think sometimes the parents that teach their kids, don’t always follow through with how their children are acting. I see this all the time in play areas. The children who the parents think aren’t in need of supervision are the ones who need it the most. It’s like the children take advantage of the parent’s trust.

  10. Lois Alter Mark

    I agree that bullying begins at home, and I think parents should be accountable for their children’s actions. I’m sorry your child had to experience any of that.

  11. Veronica

    That to me is the unthinkable. Bullying a special needs child is just the lowest of lows. Their parents need to trained on good parenting

  12. Nicole

    Unfortunately special needs children are huge targets. My kiddo hasn’t experienced it yet but I know he likely will because he doesn’t understand teasing. He just now has gotten to the point when his dad and I are talking that he asks us, “Is that a joke?”

  13. Pam

    I understand where you are coming from and I agree for the most part, but I do think there are children that have parents that have set good examples and still can make mistakes. It is what those children and parents do after they are called on it that makes the difference to me.

    I am really sorry this happened to your child and am glad he was oblivious to it.

  14. Gingermommy

    When we have experienced bullying regarding the kids being different in some way, we found it rooted from the parents. Bullies are very insecure but they do so much damage. If a parent sees their child has a bullying personality, I hope they take action while they still can

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